Adult Self Injury Awareness

At the end of February I attended a Self Harm Awareness Course run by two dynamic ladies, Katie and Nicki from Cardiff Adult Self-Injury Project (CASIP). A group which was conceived from the realisation that there were no services in the South Wales area to support people over the age of 18 who self-injure; the popular misconception being that self-harm only affects young adolescents. Attendees of the course mainly appeared to be made up of Student Mentors and various Student Services staff.

I had a personal interest in this course; twenty(ish) years ago I used to self-harm. It lasted for a few years after a couple of awful incidents and when I was feeling out of control with life around me. I needed something to focus on, and hurting myself was the easiest way of doing that. It was a physical manifestation of the pain I was feeling inside. I wanted someone to help me but I couldn't vocalise it. It happened again briefly when I suffered post-natal depression a few years later. I look now and my scars are barely visible (yes the do fade with time!), but when I think about it, I remember how I felt as that young woman the turmoil I was experiencing inside. Then I think about what I'm doing now, and I realise how strong I have become!

Katie and Nicki challenged preconceived ideas about people that self-harm. Many people think that it is a form of attention seeking. Nurses in Accident and Emergency (or even psychiatric) departments consider these individuals to be time wasters and treat the injury as a diagnosis rather than a reflection of the true distress that that person is suffering.
10% of those who self-harm will commit suicide within 10 years.*
We learnt that these individuals, if not dismissed were made to feel ten times worse by being labelled as time wasters, they are simply brushed off as having 'just a personality disorder'! Katie and Nicki informed us that self-harm as a specific psychiatric disorder was under negotiation to be made a category of its own, so that sufferers can receive appropriate treatment instead of being grouped together under the 'personality disorder' umbrella.

So what should one do when made aware of or approached by someone that self-harms? 
DO NOT:
-Panic and remove all sharp objects! This is an often unhelpful reaction of parents.
-Use emotional blackmail! For example, telling them how much they are hurting you by doing what they are doing.
-Accuse them of being attention seeking and brush them off.
DO:
-Consider unhelpful reactions they may have previously received.
-Acknowledge and validate the fact that they have chosen to communicate and TRUST you!
-Respect their choice if/whilst they continue to self-harm.
-Help them to recognise the root cause of their actions. This may involve helping them find an appropriate support group.
-Be honest with them if you feel out your depth and need to refer them to a professional.
-Allow the person to remain in control, ask them what help they want from you.
But most of all, listen!

I read the following somewhere once, I can't remember where though, but it's a motto I have continued to live by:

"I embrace every dreadful event that ever happened to me. They made me me!"

*Butler, J.; Longhitano, C., (2008). Self-Harm. Psychiatric Aspects of General Medicine. 36 (9), pp.455-458